Amadan
Posts: 1337
Joined: Jan. 2007
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I read that a British dance company are staging a work inspired by Darwin’s junket to the Galapagos – video clip here.
I have no doubt that all here share my indignation at the unfairness of this. Discussion of evolution should be balanced, preferably with grainy clips of goose-stepping Sturmabteilungen, indignantly-read scripture, and lascivious close-ups of Sarah Palin’s big, firm, round, graspable, motherly spectacles. But this we cannot do, given the meagre resources left after meeting our commitments to godless depravity and corruption of the vulnerable.
In lieu of this, and as a token of the esteem in which we all hold the folks at UD, I propose we write an operetta for them. I give below my unworthy preliminary sketches and invite fellow misfits, nitwits and nincompoops here to add to it as they may.
I need hardly emphasise the importance of this. Without attention, ID would surely wither away and die. And then where would we be?
Yeomen of the God – A One-Note Operetta
Overture, conducted by a handsome young man in a frilly shirt
Necessarily similar to, but by no means plagiarised from, La Gaza Ladra ("The Quotemining Magpie") by Rossini)
SCENE 1
Chorus of HebrewJudeo-Christian Slaves
Our great country’s becoming a pain in the ass
Since they ripped out the Bible from Biology class
Our existence is teetering on the ledge
What we need is a strategy document called the Wedge.
Then those libruls will get what was always their due
And the White House will always be Red and never Blue.
And if high-tech all moves to some foreign land
It won’t matter ‘cause soon the Rapture will be at hand
Let’s pray, let’s pray
That the Rapture comes soon!
Let’s pray, let’s pray
That the Rapture comes soon!
[Enter Guillermo, a genius]
I found a watch, it’s not my own, but I’ll appropriate it,
If someone says it’s Paley’s, he’ll be excommunicated!
It’s firmly sealed and how it works is purely hypothetical,
But unimportant stuff like that is really just pathetical.
This artefact no junkyard storm could possibly assemble
And if you say Life’s not a watch, I’ll volubly dissemble.
So by default, we must assume, Design must be Divine.
This theory, which is all my own, is mine, I tell you, MINE!
[Enter Scrotus, Guillermo’s lackey]
A hammer I hold o’er the heads of the herd
Of sheep who attend to my Master’s each word.
They soon figure out that an off-message bleat
Will have them ejected right into the street,
With a lump on their skull, right on top of their dome-o
So they better remember that I am il uomo.
Scrotus: Master, do you love me?
Guillermo: Hush, fool! Do you espy that curiously shaven canine walking in a most peculiar way?
Scrotus: ‘Tis not a pooch, my lord, it is a Canooch.
[Enter Ritardella, a respectable, ummm, whatever...]
They call me a journalist, some kind of journalist, though I can never tell why:
My facts are selective, my grammar’s defective, my IQ would make Dave’s look high.
I blog for homeschoolers and other such droolers, though nobody visits at all.
I use first-class sources for all my discourses, like Fox and WorldNet and TownHall!
I’ve written a book, with a similar kook, on the spiritual nature of mind –
If you open my head, it’s reliably said, that there’s nothing at all you can find!
Scrotus: Master, tell me, do you love me?
Guillermo: (Ignores Scrotus’s pleading) Ritardella, come to me.
Ritardella: Lose the fat kid first.
To Be Continued
Edited by Lou FCD on Sep. 03 2009,21:18
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"People are always looking for natural selection to generate random mutations" - Densye 4-4-2011
JoeG BTW dumbass- some variations help ensure reproductive fitness so they cannot be random wrt it.
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